Friday, December 12, 2008

"THE FRONT OF THE LINE (THE SUBWAY SONG)" - Metallica

In honor of my last blog on the great 'Weird Al' Yankovic, I've decided to post one of my many, many (two, actually) personal creations of song parodies. This one is to the tune of "The End Of The Line", a rocker from Metallica's latest album, Death Magnetic. Inspired and conceived of entirely by Rob Florance, but fleshed out and written almost entirely by me, this song is from the voice of a dedcated Subway sandwich restaurant manager who proudly wants to please the customer, but is also trying to train new employees. I call it "The Front Of The Line (The Subway Song)". Press play on the player to hear the original Metallica song, and read along to the new lyrics I've written and posted below.

P.S. This just goes to show that not everyone can do it as good as The Mighty Yankovic.





"The Front Of The Line (The Subway Song)"

Need... More and more
Sandwiches today!
Greet... Customers
“Welcome to Subway!” you’ll say!
Grain... Honey Oat
Is starting to corrode
Stain... On that shirt
That’s just the way that this job goes

Choke… on our food
We’ve got a Heimlich chart!
Scorch... burned the bread
That Pizziola’s way too charred
Careful!... Machinery
Now Greg’s an amputee
Employer... You treat him well
We’re “equal opportunity”!

Meatballs and Marinara
Eat more and more
Try a double-stack! I dare ya!
Eat more and more

Check out our Coke machine
The root beer tastes like gasoline
It’s almost quittin’ time
Nevermind...
You've reached the front of the line

Breads… Got eight kinds
They’re all dry as a bone!
Cheeses! Four more kinds
From peperjack to provolone!
Toasted!… if you want
But please make up your mind
Let’s go, man!… I’m short on staff
And got six more people in line

Sweet Onion Teriyaki!
Eat more and more
Ol’ Jared’s getting stocky!
Eat more and more

Check out our Coke machine
The iced tea smells like kerosene
It’s almost quittin’ time
Nevermind...
You've reached the front of the line.

Dropping pickles in a line
Spilling olives all the time
No more mayonnaise today
We’ll be okay...

But don’t forget the mustard
But don’t forget the mustard
But don’t forget the mustard

Don’t you forget the mustard!
Need more and more
Don’t make me get too flustered!
Need more and more

Check out that Coke machine
That’s the darkest Sprite I’ve ever seen
It’s almost quittin’ time
Nevermind...
Five-Dollar-Foot-long sign
Says it’s ‘only for a limited time’
Chips & a drink today?
Now you’ll pay!
‘Cause you've reached the front of the line

The front of the line.
The front of the line.
The front of the line.
You've reached the front of the line




2 comments:

your favorite cousin from Oakland said...

Hit me with your pet shark... fire away.

Anonymous said...

lol You're somethin' else...
I gotta admit that was pretty clever.

I liked it :)